Messed Up… But Not For Long…

Hey guys, check this out…

I feel like a mess…

I feel so empty, tired, pathetic, hopeless…

I don’t know if maybe I’m just physically tired or maybe there are really a lot of things going on in me right now…

I’m tired of balancing things…
I’m tired of analyzing everything…
I’m tired of planning eveything…
I’m tired of running away…
I’m tired of making things work…
I’m tired of finding reasons for everything…

I’m not blaming anybody… I just feel like I’m making a big mess out of my whole life…

Things are getting more complex and harder… I actually want to quit…
It’s like wanting to drop everything off and start from scratch…
The only problem is… I can’t

I get so preoccupied that it’s so hard to listen for Divine guidance…

Desperate for a yoke that is easy and a burden that is light…
Eager to know what the Real Plan is behind all these things…

Can do nothing but breakdown…

Ah…

Seems pathetic right?

That was actually me talking. Lol!

I saved this post because that was what I actually felt for God-only-knows-how-long. Right now, reading it again, it seems so absurd and laughable but I felt the extreme opposite of that when I was actually writing it. I was so down and hopeless I actually thought my life stinks.

But God has been so good. I whined about “I get so preoccupied that it’s so hard to listen for Divine guidance… “, but all along His words were standing right in front of me, slapping at my face… I was even looking at the answers everytime I read my blog! Crazy! Then, out of nowhere and for whatever reason, I received a forwarded e-mail from a colleague that goes like this…

Dear SOLDIER,

I see that you’re tired..
I tell you, drop your sword and put down your shield..
Why worry about the firght?
After all, it’s not your battle. It’s MINE!
All you have to do is to be in the battle field.
Then against the thousand who tried to destroy you, there I will stand and rescue you.
Winning this war requires neither only Me nor only you..
But rather, ME and YOU!

Just do your best and I’ll take care of the rest!

Your COMMANDER,
JESUS

Then, the following day at care group, people started talking about the same things, lifting our burdens to God, let go and let God take care of them, and the likes. Now if those words were not from God then I don’t know where they came from. They were pointing out to a single thing…

Exodus 14:13-14.

To BE STILL…

The very foundation of this blog’s existence..

Looking back, it amazes me how God worked His way when there seemed to be no way. How He completes us from our brokeness. How His words are heard in the silence after the tears. Exactly what David Baroni said in his poem.

O Beautiful Affliction
Merciful pain
This mortal wounding bringing me to life again
In suffering there’s healing
This darkness revealing
Silence speaking volumes to my soul
O Beautiful Affliction
Blessed brokenness that makes me whole.

God doesn’t want us to face the battle on our own. He wants us to keep still… Stay on guard and draw strength from Him.. Because after all it’s not through our own strength that we’ll achieve victory but through the deliverance the Lord will give us.

13 Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The “egyptians” you see today you will never see again. 14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Hallelujah!

5 thoughts on “Messed Up… But Not For Long…

  1. 13 Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The “egyptians” you see today you will never see again. 14 The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

    What a nice reminder. Thanks, Arthur! I’ll let Him take care of my “Egyptians” here.🙂 (Of course, I’m talking figuratively here lest someone thinks I’m being racist. :-))

  2. this post speaks volumes to me *smiles* but nevertheless, again, i am so happy to learn that you have finally heard Him. keep up your walk with Him.🙂

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